Someone Show the New Kids Where the Bathroom Is……

Holy crap.

We were BY FAR the most active team at the trade deadline.

What a terrifying day.  Thankfully, I had planned ahead and stashed all the Czechs in a secret, underground bunker for safe keeping.  I accidentally let them out 15 minutes after the deadline, foolishly thinking the worst had passed.  When the trades kept coming, I had to quickly herd them back into the bunker.  It actually wasn’t that difficult.  I just had to chase Vrbata in and the rest came flying in to protect him.  😀

With all these trades, I will start out with the most important part.

Mueller is gone.  I know he needs a new start, but I’m sad to see him go.  Such a classy kid.  My first jersey.  My first sign.  My first random meeting in a bar.

And to anyone who is talking shit about him, shut the fuck up.  You can try to comment from the outside, but you’re just being a douche because you don’t know what was really going on.  Much like Teek, I will roll with this kid ’til the wheels fall off.

Muels, I hope you score a hat trick against us every game from now until you retire.  The silver-lining in all of this is that you not only get a fresh start, you also get to be free of any unpleasant Shrek type characters that Phoenix possesses.  Peace be with you.

What we got:

Derek Morris:  Not sure how I feel about this, just because he had some interesting things to say after he left.  We forked over a 4th round pick for Dmo.

Wojtek Wolski:  You’re big and European.  I may grow to love you.  We shall see.  As of now, you are not under the umbrella.  Muels and Porter (AHL) went to the Avs.

Lee Stempniak:  An American 22 year old.  Are you the new Mueller?   Matt Jones (AHL) and a 7th round pick went to Toronto.

Petteri Nokelainen:  You are our third Finn.  Are the Finns trying to overtake the Czechs?  NEVER!  A sixth ground pick went to the Ducks.

Alexandre Picard:  We sent away Porter’s buddy Chad Kolarik (AHL) for you.  Can you get your crap together?  He’s going straight to AHL.

Miika Wiikman:  Awwwwww hello token Ranger trade!  And a goalie, of course!  We gave the Rangers a seventh round pick and Anders Eriksson for this lil goalie that has a haircut like Kate of Jon/Kate plus 8.  Eek!  Uppy, fix this!

Mathieu Schneider:  Sean Zimmerman (AHL) and a pick go to the Canucks for this geezer 😛

What it all means:

Fuck it, we’re going all out for the playoffs.  Muels, I’ll see you tomorrow nite when we play the Avs and I will yell for you.

Advertisements
This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Someone Show the New Kids Where the Bathroom Is……

  1. SueAnn says:

    “When the trades kept coming, I had to quickly herd them back into the bunker. It actually wasn’t that difficult. I just had to chase Vrbata in and the rest came flying in to protect him. :D”

    Oh my goodness. You’re so clever & funny. I missed your blog during the Olympics! I just laughed really hard with that comment ^

    As for Mueller, I’m sad to see him go, you always wanna see someone who was drafted here, grow with the team in Doan fashion.

    I do believe it’ll do him good though. His goal in tonight’s game makes me believe that. Whatever his slump has been about, he hasn’t been able to fix it here. I wish him the best of luck.

  2. Marko says:

    Actually, you got Wiikman AND a 7th rounder for Eriksson..

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s