Jesus loves me this I know, for the scoreboard tells me so

We don’t win in Detroit and tonight was going to be no different.  We just can’t do it.  We haven’t done it in like four years. Everyone has a downfall and the Joe is ours.  Fine.   We’ll pick up points at home this week 😦

First period:  I always forget how much Detroit controls the puck.  We didn’t play terrible, they just really control the puck a lot.  This means our D has to work their asses off and Bryz gets a hard workout.  Great 😐

Datsyuk scores.  I hate Detroit.  It’s so much harder when we’re behind and have to chase the game.  Bah.

Pru, you can't beguile the puck, it only works on humans.

Second period:  We’re alive!  ALIVE!  Power play woes?  Yes, we haz them, but Uppy managed to cram the damn puck into the net from Lombo and Jesus!  Tie game!

Umm don't damage the Uppy

Wait, we’re not done!  Yandle?  YANDLE!   I am totally giving props to Radim for a slick pass from the corner that caught a streaking Yandle towards the goal and he buries it!  VRBY with the keen eyes!

HOW YOU LIKE THAT DET…… oh you scored.  Hmm.  Thank you for the reality check, I was about to get carried away with hope.  Eaves ties it 😦

Gah!

Third period:  Ok, we can do this!

No, no we really can’t.  Lindstrom scores.  Twice.  Yes, twice.  No it wasn’t a replay, it was twice.

They test for steriods but not rabies. WTF?

1:30 left in the game and we are down by two.  It’s happening again.  The downward slide at mid-season.  We’re screwed.  Who did we think we were?  *Sigh*

Oh wait.  We’re the goddamn Phoenix Coyotes.

Jesus is our Captain.  Czechs are our heart.  We have a Russian Wall.  And you may not kick our ass thank you very much.

When we need scoring, we call our Dmen.  1-800-3Ya-ndle …. Yes, is this You Can’t Handle My Yandle?  I’m calling for Keith, we need a goal delivered.  When do we need it by?  Umm right the hell now.  You can do that?  You deliver right?    Yes, Yandle delivers.   Does that boy ever deliver, let me tell you.   You are alright in my book kid.

Still down by one.  23 seconds to go.  1-900-the-jovo (cuz it just feels like Jovo would want you to pay for the call…. just sayin).  Hi, Jovo’s cramming service?  I need a puck crammed into the goal.  When?  ASAP.  In the next 23 seconds for sure.  Yes, I’m sorry for the short notice.  I have to pay extra?  Your service is already the most expensive on the te…… fine, I can play extra for immediate delivery.  *mutters*

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!

TIE GAME!

OOOOOOOOOOOOOVERTIME and we have the momentum.

Jesus had a rough game.  His D was a bit suspect and he was in the box for one of the goals.  How does he make up for it?

And on the 7th day, he made pucks fly

We win.  In overtime.  At the Joe.  Against the Red Wings.  With a goal by our Captain Jesus.

Sometimes life just works out.

MVP of the Game ~ Yandlepants.  I… you… two goals….. *impressed*

Most Improved:  Korpikoski ~ You are crazy all over the place good.  I’m excited you’re here.  Have you ever considered dual citizenship with Czech Republic?  Just think about it.  You don’t have to give me an answer right now.

Alright humor me, I had an epiphany during the game.  Doan is Jesus.  That is undeniable fact due to recent DNA testing I secretly had done (*olympic drug tests my ass*).  If we didn’t have Jesus, I think our Captain would have to be Z.  I always forget how incredibly …..Z-like he is.  He’s incredibly responsible defensively.  He busts his ass.  He blocks so many shots and I can’t even tell you how many games/points he has saved for us because he ‘s like our primary goalie and Bryz only deals with what gets by Z.  Tonight the puck got past Bryz.  Z dives into the mess and pushes the puck away from the goal line with his hand and it gets cleared.

But you are a puck magnet!

He’s ………..Z.  I don’t know what to say other than that he is my hero (other than Doan and Angry Doan).  Z, when you make insane plays it makes me wanna do the Uppy/Vandypants hat trick celebration with you.  But I get to be Uppy ok?  ❤  Yes, yes it’s mushy, but it’s Z and I don’t want him to leave us and get stolen at the end of the year.  STAY Z STAY!  Prosim?

LIES!

And and BTW, big news about something big going down on Friday.  Hmmm.  I guess you’ll have to tune in to find out…..

Here’s a hint:

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3 Responses to Jesus loves me this I know, for the scoreboard tells me so

  1. Kels says:

    “Jesus is our Captain. Czechs are our heart. We have a Russian Wall. And you may not kick our ass thank you very much.”

    SWEET!

    Great game!

    And I’m glad you are warming to Korpedo. Lauri. Korpi. Whatever you are going to name him. When Don Maloney did that interview and praised Pru, he said Korpikoski was the nicest surprise.

  2. Jocie says:

    I knew this night would be epic for the following reasons:

    1) I was doing my homework with some Yotes pencils I found with our old school mascot from the dollar store

    2) My dad sent me a picture of my ticket for Saturdays game…and literally 2 seconds later I got a Yotes text saying to watch on Vs.

    3) Right before Doan scored , the palms of both of my hands started to bleed. Our Lord and Savior Shane Doan blessed me with stigmata to ensure a win. (My palms really were bleeding for no reason)

    Coincidences? I think not.

    Also, I agree with everything you said about Z. If he doesn’t renew his contract I think a little part of every Coyotes fan will die. Maybe we should start a petition and get everyone to sign it then give it to him at the carnival. Operation Save Z?

  3. boedkerrocks says:

    way da go…keep up them phone calls…..now thats lightening speed delivery we got!!! I’ll chip in when the bill gets to high:))

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