We don’t roll over, unless you count rolling over you

Today started off being epic and full of win.  I got to sleep in (win), I got my new jersey (win), I became the Foursquare mayor of Jobing.com Arena (win),  I’m currently in the lead of selling Coyotes tickets for the Ambassador Club (win), and I got another puck (wiiiiiiiiin).   I knew that the game was going to be awesome.

I just didn’t realize that it was going to be awesomely bad.  Bah!

The game started pretty well!  We got the first goal!  It was a Jovo netting, assisted by Lombo and Yandle.  This isn’t the last we will hear about Jovo, trust me….

Poor Pseudo is left out

Bryz thinks dats a funny shaped puck in his net

Then Marty went to the box for some bogus penalty.  He’s not a hooker!  I assure you!  We killed off the penalty.  This is not the last of the penalty box we’ll hear of….

With about three minutes left in the game, the Islanders score.  Fine, we’ll go in tied.  Wait…. we lost our shit again at the end of the period and let them score in the last minute.  UGH!  We cannot go back to how it was last year, falling apart at the end of periods.  Sure that goddamn defense up until the buzzer rings!

At the very end of the period, Jovo elbowed Tavares.  He gets a game misconduct.  They show the ref explaining it to Tippett and you can see Radim go pfft and roll his eyes.  LMAO!  Vrby!  So the Islanders will have 4:44 playing against 4 Coyotes for the start of the period.

Second Period:  This will forever be knows as the mother-fing debacle to end all debacles.  WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH US????????

So instead of 4:44 of powerplay to kill, we ended up having 4 players for like 9 hours because we didn’t put anyone in the goddamn box to serve Jovo’s penalty.  What kind of stupid freaking insane ass stupid idiotic mistake was this?  We actually gave them 07:46 of power play time because there were no whistles to stop play until Marty got hit in the face and slashed the guy back for it, stopping play.


Back the fuck up.

MARTY GOT HIT IN THE FACE?  WHO……HOW………@#$%@#$%@#$%@$%^$%^!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I’m just putting this warning out there.  The next player that messes up Marty’s face….. I’ll Gilbert Arenas your ass, for real.

Anyways, between the 7:46 of Jovo and the 2:00 of Marty boxness, the freaking Islanders started the period with 9:46 of power play.  Oh yeah and then Adrian got 2 minutes, so make it 11:46 of power play to start the period.

During this time, the Islander’s scored 2 goals.  4-1.  Bryz gets pulled.  LaBarbara in.

We are so screwed.  Let’s pack it up.  Start the bus.  Peace out.

Third period:

Wait a minute.  We’re the Phoenix Coyotes.  We have Jesus.  We have mad Czech power.  We have mean ass Vandypants and Adrian.  You can’t come in our house and push us around.  We’ll punch you in the head and shove your stupid asses down!

The entire feel of the team was 180 degrees different.  You could feel it.

Who scores the first goal?  Bizz!  No, I said who scored the first goal, not who had the first fight.  No, seriously, Bizz had the first goal.  HOLY CRAP!  BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIZZ!  You’re the lil offensive juggernaut!

Game changing point:  Pseudo gets high-sticked and he ended up bleeding.  4 minute power play.

Taylor scores!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Shane! Be nice to Pseudo!

Mueller scores!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Wait!  Mueller scores?  HOLY CRAP!  MUELLER SCORES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  With the Czech power play!  Vrbs and Pru had assists.  It was amazing!  I had the Mueller jersey with me and I was so excited that I could thrust his name up in the air.  I knew you could do it.  Now you know too Peter!


You did it Peter!

Czechs and Peter are magic!

Tie game bitches!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Overtime:  This was all about Winnik.  Winnik had the most epic forecheck I’ve seen in a long time.  Seriously.  He took on the entire Islander’s team during a change and managed to keep them trapped in their own zone for like 30 seconds all on his own.  That was awesome Winnie.

Shootout (damnit):

Pseudo ~ GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAL!  Good job Pesudo!  You’re becoming a shootout mainstay!

Prucha ~ (Tippett totally must be reading the blog!!!!)  Prukins almost made it.  Almost.


Radim ~ Saved.

Mueller ~ Good move but the damn post hates us!

Doan ~ Save.

The End.

Jesus cut his hair

Jesus cut his hair.  I’m concerned.  He looked extremely uncomfortable on point for the powerplay.  Ultra uncomfortable.  He had a very weird night.  Even Jessica, who has only seen three games, was like, what’s up with Jesus?

MVP ~ LaBarbara.  You were perfect when you came in and gave us a chance to come back and steal a point.

Most Improved ~ The fans!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   The fans were super into the game.  They boo’d the refs!  They cheered super loud!  They did the wave.  No, for real, they did the wave.  They cheered and cheered and helped the electric feeling that helped the boys come back in the third.  Good job fans!  Keep that shit up!

Tip for Tippett:  Sami and Mueller did well.  Quit scratching them damnit!  Also here’s a helpful hint:  Remember to put a man in the box to serve the penalty.

Memorable plays:  Yandle diving trying to keep the puck in the zone.  Marty stealing the puck and having  a breakaway on PK (he was totally hooked at the end ya damn blind refs).  Vandypants brutalizing  this dude who had to limp off to the bench.  Adrian pushing this dude after play and then Vandy immediately hitting him in the opposite direction.  Brutal!

I’m bummed we didn’t get two points because we really should have beaten the Islanders.  However, these things happen and we eeked a point out of a game we had no business getting one from based on our second period debacle.

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4 Responses to We don’t roll over, unless you count rolling over you

  1. Sec 104 row G representin'!! says:

    I’m reading alot about how people dont think Doan should be in the shootout….Thoughts on that? And Mueller? I know you have a soft spot for him, but has he connected on a shootout yet this year? Robbed by the post tonight? Should he keep getting the chance? I was glad to see Prucha out there tonight, wish he would have scored however….

    • yotesgurl says:

      Doan has lost his confidence. However, as he showed in the shootout competition that he won at the All-Star game, he does have mad skills. It’s a toss up with him. YES! Mueller has connected in the shootout this year, it was in San Jose and he did this little kick move. Korpo also scored in that one and we won. Not that I keep track in my head or anything (totally do). Prucha was alright, but he’s more of a quick, sneaky around the net kind of scorer, so shootout isn’t necessarily his forte.

      I say you put Adrian in the shootout and he skates down, hits the goalie in the head with is left arm, while pushing the puck into net with his other. It would be amazing.

  2. Forgetting to put someone in the penalty box to serve Jovo’s time was hella stupid. I mean come on they killed off that penalty BEAUTIFULLY. Then to be stuck in penalty kill mode over a dumb thing like no guy being in the box. Horrible.

    I think Doan needs ot stay in shoot outs. He’s going to come around. As for Mueller, the boy has been showing he wants to play & I’ve noticed the more patient he is the better outcomes he gets.


  3. Kels says:

    I was twittering that the Rangers did that last year but it was a conscious (moronic) move by the coach to not put someone in the box, thinking there would be a whistle. The Rangers played down for around 35 seconds, nowhere near what the Yotes did.

    Bizarre damn game though.

    Good news (on some personal level) for two games in a row, Prucha is 4-1 on faceoffs. Renney never would have let him near a faceoff unless he had no choice. Kid used to play center way back. He’s not half bad at it, probably, cause he battles.

    Hope the Yotes pick it up soon. Lots of January games!!

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