Planes, Trains, and Automobiles……. all things I will use to maim Jared Boll

What a crazy ass game.  There was cheering!  There was fighting!  There was a murder plot!

The game was pretty much a merry-go-round of points for the Up-Do-Bo line.  Shane! Lombo! Uppy!   Uppy! Shane! Lombo!  Lombo! Uppy!  Shane…….

Beware evil-doers!

Uppy scored first and then Lombo.  That was all the scoring in the first because we wanted to ease into this new offense we’re trying out.  It’s called actually scoring.  It’s kind of radical, but desperate times call for desperate measures!  Then in the second:

A Christmas/Birthday miracle?

Jesus remembers how to score!  We’re saved!  Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!  With assists to Up-Bo of course.

*Insert here some D-bag from Columbus scoring*  It was Brassard.  Ok so we wouldn’t get the shutout.  Oh well.  It’s ok Bryz!

By this time I was eating some chicken, so it was a matter of time before a Czech scored.  It was Vrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrby!  WOOHOO Radim!  You are on a crazy points streak!  I’m so exci………………………wait.  What the hell is going…………..WHO THE FUCK IS PUSHING RAD…………………….OH MY DOAN MARTY IS HITTING THAT GUY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  MARTY WINNING…….MARTY WINNING……MARTY WINNING…….OH GOD…….. MARTY LOSING…………MARTY LOSING……….IM GONNA FUCKING KILL THAT DUDE…….MARTY DOWN………….SWEET JESUS…………MARTY DOWN……………..MUST SCALE GLASS AND KICK BOLL IN HIS DIRTY VAGINA………………MUST GOUGE BOLL IN THE EYES…………….MARTY STILL DOWN…………CZECH BLOOD ON ICE…………..WILL STAB TOOTHPICKS UNDER BOLL’S FINGERNAILS…………….MARTY KIND OF UP, BUT BLEEDING………………..ANGER BLACKOUT………….

Taylor knows what's coming.........

Boll when I'm through with him...... If he apologizes to Marty and I'm feeling charitable

Some more game happened.  I dunno what to write cuz I was pissed and not paying super close attention……….

Third period:

Uppy scores!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The game got  really scrappy after the Boll incident.  Bizz had to beat on some guy and basically handed him his ass.  GO BIZZ!!!!!!!!!!!  You so nasty.  But you didn’t beat up Boll 😐  I have a plan for this, don’t worry.

When things got rough, the Blue Jackets broke out Tae-bo moves? Really?

Yeah, yeah the Blue Jackets scored another goal (it was reviewed) but we controlled most of the game and our offense seems to be firing on a couple cylinders, thanks mainly to Vrby, Uppy, and Lombo.  I like it boys, keep it up!

Uppy and .......... Lombo?

MVP of the Game:  Uppy!!!!!!!!!  Two goals and an assist?  Badass!

Most Improved:  Jesus!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  A goal and two assists?  Praise Jesus!

Tip for Tippett:  That new dude.  Umm I refuse to call him Bubba.  Play Sami damnit!  (I would say thanks for playing Mueller, but I’m pretty sure you only did that because Fiddy couldn’t play.)

Love Just Because I Can:  Marty 😦   Don’t worry Marty!  I told Vandypant’s wife to make Vandy beat Boll up.  And Vandy don’t play!

Target: Boll

GET HIM VANDYPANTS!

Unforgiven

Hai Bryz!

Gratuitious Czech Picture

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One Response to Planes, Trains, and Automobiles……. all things I will use to maim Jared Boll

  1. CK says:

    Wow…what an entertaining game! Great recap, and I think you pretty much nailed everyones reaction on the Czech line shenanigans.

    Holy…3 points out of the division and conference leads!? With a TON of home games coming up?! Oh my…the plot thickens!

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