Sometimes C is for Captain and sometimes C is for Christ

After the offensive explosion (and impending defensive implosion) of last night, I expected the boys to wander back to our 1/2/3 goal per game range.  This made me a bit nervous because our Great Wall of China Russia had the night off and Labarbara was in net.  Have I given him a fair shake?  Maybe not.  Does he make me freak out when he plays?  Yes!

About two minutes into the game Jovo 2.o (Yandle) scores!!!!!!!!!!  It was a pretty move where he bobbed and weaved through the defenders with the puck and hit the back of the net.  It will most definitely make the “Forward” audition tape.

Yandle scores just to feel the love. Hugs give him warm fuzzies.

At this point, we go into “Coyote” mode which is:  holy crap we have the lead!  That means we scored!  Let’s make this a stalemate for a long time!  Go us!

The rest of the 1st period and second period went like this:  there was skating, puck movement, some hits, and people playing hockey.  OH YEAH!  And there were freaking penalities!!!!!!  Marty, Pseudo, Pru, Doan, and Uppy all had penalties.  Obviously this ref was freaking racist against Czechs.  And was secretly dating Nash and therefore gave Uppy that penalty.

Doan is an honorary Czech and Marty wants to see Pseudo's birth certificate

Anyways, our PK pretty much kicked ass other than letting one douchey Nash goal in.  But they had 6….6!!!!! power plays.  Good job PK, keep kicking ass and taking names.  Speaking of kicking ass…..

Denied.

So of course we end with a tie.  No OT goals because the team thought it would be funny to completely freak me out and have LaBarbara in a shootout.  They showed both goalie save percentages in shootouts and Garon’s was ridiculously high (like 72%) and LaBarbara’s was ridiculously low (like 32%).  Sweet Jesus.

First up:  some BJ douche.  Denied.  Thank Doan.

Us:  VRBY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Did not score.  Hey, Vrby, totally thought you would have scored because I had chicken for lunch and that = czech scoring.  WTF?

BJ:  Nash goal.  Damn it.  Can someone Tonya Harding this guy already?  WHOA VANDY!  I WAS KIDDING!  But thanks for offering.  Extra stocking stuffers for you.

Us:  Doan!  Money.

BJ:  Some other dude…… denied?  Really?  Good job LaBarbara.

Us:  ……. PSEUDO!!!!!!!!!!!  GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAL!  Wait, if I ate chicken and Pseudo scored… does this mean he really is Czech?  \o/

WE WIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  2 points baby!

Jovo trying "get over" finding out Yandle is a hug ho

MVP of the game:  LaBarbara.  Really Amy?  Yep, I guess.  I bag on LaBarbara way too much.  Haven’t seen him enough to really make a good decision.  Maybe he’s just a better road goalie than home goalie?  Props to you Jason.

Who’s on FIRE?  Yandle.  I’m gonna refrain from teaching him stop, drop, and roll unless it really looks like he’s about to die tho.  Go Yandle!

Tip for Tippett:  Once again this is about Mueller.  Yes, we won the shootout, but Mueller is our shootout ace and we don’t have a lot of those.  Think about that.

If Thou Shalt not hit Jesus in the junk is Commandment #11, then this is #12

Dear Shane Doan,

You played in your 1,000th game tonight.  I’m am not kidding or exaggerating  for humor in the least when I say that you are my hero.  You are the nicest, most genuine person on the face of the Earth.  I do not believe we could ever ask for anything more in a Captain.  When I call you Jesus, it’s because I think so highly of you that I would not be surprised if you could walk on water.  I wish everyone had even one-quarter of the integrity and loyalty that you exude.   Love you like a fat kid loves cake-covered-pie.

~ Amy Jo

PS ~ If you were Czech, you’d actually be perfect.  But hey, you’re pretty close.

Hey! Where'd dat Blue Jacket guy go?

I always have a hard time writing about games that are really defensive struggles (welcome to our entire season) and especially defensive struggles that I only see on TV.  So I will leave you with this:

No, no. We want a transparent helmet for Uppy. Not a transparent player for a visable helmet. Dumb elves.

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